Up one Sunday after a night of heavy drinking I decided it would be nice to make pancakes from scratch. I soon realized that I had none of the proper ingredients, but feeling ambitious I decided to substitute. No flour, instead cornmeal, no sugar but plenty of packets of artificial sweeteners! I mixed in an egg or two and a cup of milk and created what looked like pancake batter ( they would just taste a little like cornbread). Once on the frying pan the cornmeal lumped to the middle and the artificial sweetener mixed with egg bubbled around it and started smoking. Solidified it looked like a fried egg... a cakey dry cornmeal circle surrounded by a clear, frighteningly plastic like substance with bits of cooked egg in it. It smelled like someone had covered a corn muffin in glue and lit it on fire.
I still ate it.